Hervey Bay, the Kaikoura of New Zealand

Sorry all, I am getting more and more useless with updates.
I am turning into a lazy Aussie slob. I am probably generalising a bit too much. I should have said lazy Brisbane slob. My theory is that it is so hot and humid outside that people either lay around and drink or sit in the pub and drink. I have experienced this first hand as I am now 5 kg fatter. My shorts don’t fit and jeans cuts off blood circulation to the you know where. Time to go for runs or I’ll just be another statistic.

I just got back from 3 days in Hervey Bay. Hervey Bay is best known for its Whale watching and off road 4WD on Fraser Island. People come from all around the World and even Australia to partake in these activities. Unfortunately I didn’t do either for the following reasons:

a) We have bigger whales in NZ
b) No time (shit excuse I know but fat people have less energy)
c) We have bigger whales in NZ

My impression of Hervey Bay was that it was a nice laid back town so I didn’t mind when a cup of Flat White took 20mins. I just presumed they flew to Brazil to collect the beans themselves.
We finished work early and decided to have a few drinks at the local pub. I was by far the youngest there, although I am only 19. So as I stood at the bar waiting to get served, I noticed that the Bar tender was pregnant. As she turned toward me, my jaws dropped, she was honestly 13 years old. Shocking!
A few more drinks later, we saw the bartenders sprint out the door. Being the nosey drunk kiwi, I decided to take a look and saw the following:

1) 15 year old, 58kg male (drunk) pinned against the wall.
2) 15 year old female (drunk) trying to fight off the guys holding the male subject.
3) Liquor store within 10 meters of the tussle
4) Case of beer (24 pack) on the floor.
5) No sign of getaway car.

If you haven’t figured it out, the couples were trying to take off with a case of beers on foot. It was the funniest thing I’ve ever seen. It was hilarious. The girlfriend knew I was laughing at them so she verbally abused me, I laughed louder, she replied with more heated words, I laughed even louder, she was trying to fight off guys to get to me, I reach for my mobile phone and took a photo then laughed some more. Too bad the quality came out crap. Cops turned up 2 hours later (must have been too busy whale watching) and took the culprit away.

That’s all for now, It’s late and I need my sleep. Apparently the more sleep I get the skinnier I get says Australian media, go figure.
Off to Cairns next and will return with more updates.

Sam
P.S. It was 31 degrees today!